Wednesday, April 27, 2011

HIMSB The Truth

78, the number of the green bus that operates the Basford-City center route stops at Broadmarsh. Is he late? He's just finished a basketball training session and he texted Mai.

"Wei korg kt mana?" sends to Mai, he doesn't really get along with her.

His bulky Motorola phone rings. "Dekat Greggs" Mai replied. As soon as he utter what Mai had sent, he ran. As he arrived there, he finds himself separated. He don't get along well. But where is she? He had only come because he said he will try his best the day before. He doesn't know anyone else in Leeds except for her.

He notices her but he's shy, which sounds quite absurd. He's shy? It's hard to believe but he is. He tried to make small talk with the people but it's not going on well. As he wandered alone, she approached him.

I don't remember the exact conversation but they clicked. The chemistry, it can't be denied. She doesn't really get along with strangers, this is the first time they had met, it was only on MSN they had talk but she just can't stop talking. As they stopped at a shop, her current boyfriend approached him and said

"Wei tu awek aku do," the boyfriend is jealous, it was clear in his voice. F defended himself by saying that they're just talking. Ironically, F and the boyfriend became quite tight over the years, but the last few years has seen them dissapeared from each other's radar.

He continued to talk to her. As they walked in the bus station, his shoelaces became untied. Shoot. He looks up and the girl was waiting for him. It was courtesy, so she said. And it was this little act, that sums up the coming years.

And that ladies and gentleman, was HIMSB, the truth.


Their lifestyle, it's different. He realises this. And he's well aware of her flaws, be it insecurities or that she's mengada (is this a flaw? I don't think it is) he's all ready to accept it. He's here to stay. No promises, but he'll let his action talk.

"I still has many flaws in the term of the right path, but I will continue to try to improve on that and I'll try to my best to make sure I'll guide you towards the right path.

I've been out of this for so long, I forgotten how it felt. You're not the only one who's scared. But I'm positive, I sincerely want you, I've thought about it long enough and I'm willing to take my chances."


And when you finished reading this, buzz me. I'm online.

Monday, April 25, 2011



"Depan rumah," he texted to S.

"Oh jap, 5 mins," she replied.


She emerges from her front door. It's that brown faux leather jacket again. She carries a light bag with her, probably fill with sandwiches for the trip. She waves towards him and he reply it back enthusiastically. The sunlight shines on her, she seem sparkling, but not like Edward Cullen.

"Hi, morning!" F said as he greets her. She look at him and replied "Hi, good morning to you too! I ada pack some sanwich sikit ni, later dalam kereta boleh la makan,".

"Oh, thanks,"he said while he opens the door for her. Who says chivalry is dead?

There's Airil and his girlfriend, Wafaa at the front seat. He introduces S to them and they drove off in Airil's white Civic, it's his pride and joy. It's noisy and vibrates but it sure does go fast.

"Hey, I get carsick easily. I usually tidur dalam kereta. So uh, if I tak tahan I just tidur allright?" S said as she looks at F.

"Oh yeah sure, just tidur I kejut you bila dah sampai," and that was the last words she hear before she naps away.

The journey to Lake Taupo has been very scenic, the place is fill to brimmed with yellow leaves, it's nearing summer now. A pity she couldn't see all this.


"Hey, bangun lah. We're here," he gives her a pat on the shoulder as she still didn't wake up. "Heih, tidur mati rupanya dia ni, hey banguuuuun," he's near the point of screaming and it did the job. She wakes up feeling startled and then, there it is. The most beautiful view surrounds her. It's scenic, just like picture on postcards. Trees with yellow leaves surrounds the place, with the lake's water so clear you can see your reflection. It really is a thing of beauty, and only He can make such a beautiful place. The sunshine is just perfect, with clouds surrounding the sky. There's no better day to go to Lake Taupo.

They set up the picnic area and put the food they had brought onto the park table. There's so many choices. They have light breakfast, finishes it and put the stuff back into the trunk, deciding to have a walk there. Airil and Wafaa is already long gone then, no sight of them.


As they walk, they talk about what they have in common such as their favorite songs and also they both supported Man Utd, which in his view is a bonus point. There's a park bench, shaded by a tree and they decided to sit there. The talk has gotten deeper and now he's telling about his ex's, his heartbroken stories.

At first, she hesitated to tell hers. It wasn't in her nature to open up to people, but she feels very comfortable around him and told hers in great detail which only her best friend knows. His honesty in telling his stories, she felt it too. Maybe that's why she feels obligated to tell her story as well.

He feels that he's falling for her. It's like he had known her all his life. Where had she been all this time? Okay, that sounds like a cheesy pick up line only corny guy use.

And then, he felt it. He knows that this girl is very special. And he had known her for 7 years. And now he wants to make S, his. He wants to be the one who she could let it all out, to vent her frustration and anger. And for her to share her every thoughts, be it sad or happy thoughts.
He's here to listen to all her ramblings and complaints, her problems and he'll try his best to solve it, be it personal or academic (even if I know nothing, encik Google ada). He wants to be the one who cheer her up on her bad day and lift her spirit. He wants to be her saviour, let me be the one who closes her wounds and make her forget the past.

So SB, will you allow me be the one to fill the void in your heart, the one that has been shattered to pieces? I want this, I want you to be mine.

Sunday, April 24, 2011



He's having a great time with her, it's like they've known each other their whole life. He feels very comfortable around her and being his usual corny self. Problems seem to be thrown out the window when he's with her. It was just yesterday that he was stressing out about his final project as it was completely behind schedule. But talking to her, he feels as if he's got nothing better to do.

No one has been able to make him feel like this since She-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named. It still send shivers back to his spine, hearing her name. After all he had given, she disposed him like he meant nothing to her. Scars, deep scars has been carved on him. He has many from all the battles he fought. Love, it's complicated. It's a fatal weapon. He was alone and he had to claw his way out and succeeded. He put on such strong face but really, he's fragile.

"Hey, look our food dah sampai. Mm smells delicious, bon appetit!" he said as he try to savour the smell of the carbonara. He reach for the silverware and starts munching away, slowly and politely as he has never done before.


30 minutes, that is the longest time he has spent on eating. How was it not, he keep talking all the time, it's a wonder it didn't take an hour. It's a surprise how they could click when they always have conflicting views on almost everything and they don't have a lot in common.

Then he feels something vibrate inside his pocket. One, two times which indicates it's a text. He doesn't like to use the phone when he's hanging out. Curiousity get the better off him, he take out his phone. It was from Airil.

"Wei, Taupo jom esok. Jeles aku tengok gambar si Omar ni, cantik doh. Kau ajak ah sesiapa lagi," this is why Airil is his best friend, always with the spontaneous plans. As he look at S, he's thinking of asking her to join the ride, but they just knew each other.

"Oh, what the hell," he said to himself, and didn't realise he had say it out loud.

"Apa dia?" she asks, she was sure she heard something.

"Oh tkde, my friend ni. Dia ajak I pergi Lake Taupo tomorrow," he stop in his tracks. Should he invite her? He hesistates for a second and then "and you know what, I know this is short notice but, you nak ikut tak? Jomlah, it'll be fun!" he really emphasis when he said it'll be fun. He has seen the picture, and yes it was breathtaking but he wanted to experience it first hand. He really hope that she could come along, he doesn't seem to have enough of her.

He waits for her reaction, she takes a sip of her drink and look at him. All of this is new to her. She has never had lunch with a stranger yet here she is and now he's inviting her for a road trip. She wants to go but can she really trust him? He seem harmless. She had always wanted to go to Lake Taupo after hearing what her housemates has bragged. It was also where they film certain scenes from Lord of The Ring trilogy, one of her favorite films. She made up her mind.

"Oh, sounds good. I memang plan nak pergi pun before this but sangat malas, I ni pemalas sikit. Plus I don't have anything to do tomorrow, baru ingat nak sleep all day. So yeah, sure," she said followed by a laugh, a bit surprised at her last sentence, she feels she's a bit too honest.

Hearing those words, he feels relief, he was half-expecting her to scream "Wei kau gila ke? Baru kenal sehari dua dah nak ajak pergi jauh-jauh" to him.

"So okay then? Uh I'll pick you at your house around, say 7 pagi esok?" he said with a little bit of excitement in his voice.

"Yeah sure, later I'll text you the adress," she said. And then that familiar cheesy ringtone blares again, and it was from one of the members of MUMSA.

"Weh, dah jumpa belum planner kau? Ada meeting sekarang dekat rumah, diorang nak tengok financial report event hari tu, datang sekarang please," she reads it, dissapointed that she has to go as she still has so many things she wants to talk about.

"I'm sorry, tapi I have to go now. I ada emergency meeting," she sighes, and then add "Tomorrow at 7 kan? Jangan lambat! And thanks for having lunch, it's on me this time," This time? She hopes that there'd be a next time.

"Oh tkpe, tkdehal lah. Yeah 7, pagi tau bukan malam. And yeah, thank you belanja ni, next time I pula," he, like S, also hopes that there'd be a next time and feeling a bit ungentlemanly when she's paying the bill.

They walk out the door, bid each other goodbye and went their separate ways.

Saturday, April 23, 2011

I can still feel your presence

I miss you, Atuk. Biarlah Atuk benci Man Utd pun.

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Shoo shoo shoo

‎'cause I was in shoo-shoo-shoo, shoo-shoo-shoo
Shoo-shoo, shoo-shoo, shoo-shoo Sugar Town

Thursday, April 14, 2011

HIMSB ; Part Three


She looks like she have a lot of things on her hand. Is that.. a book? And a sandwich? And now she's putting what seemed like notes in front of her. Her phone rings a cheesy tone, which indicates a text is waiting to be read. Suddenly, she stands up and walk hastily.. towards him. She doesn't seem to be focus on where she's going and is getting nearer when..

"Bam!" They collide. Her stuff was flung all over, and she seem to be mumbling, all he can make out is

"Sorry, sorry, sorry. Saya tak tengok mana saya pergi tadi and nak cepat ni". He helps to gather her notes and books and off she went. He notices a purple notebook and as he was shouting "Hey, awak tertinggal buku ni!" she was long out of sight. He opens the book which turns out to be a planner. He scanned the planner trying to find out where she was going. And there it states on October 18th on 1500, meeting at the infamous Riddet Building.


As he makes his way towards the Riddet Building, he realises that he is surrounded by blooming trees, and what a sight to behold. Spring, what a beautiful season, it is his favourite season after all. It is getting a little chilly, so he opened up his worn bag and take out his red hoodie. It was a birthday gift from his late grandfather from 2007, and he loves that red hoodie like no other apparel he owns.

The door opened and came out a group of people. He waits for 5 minutes and nearly give up when the girl emerge from the slightly open door. Her face seem red, she seem lost. Her face didn't try hard in trying to conceal that.

He approaches her and is mesmerized. Such flawless skin, she is really beautiful. She wears a hijab but that didn't stop her from glowing. She didn't seem to notice him coming, it was if she was in her little world. He opens his mouth trying to say something but it didn't come out. He's sweaty already, his heart beating faster. His finger start to fidget, he's trying to keep it together.

"Hey, awak terlupa buku ni," he said it as if it was a race, it was fast and the girl was startled, she seem confused at first, trying to figure out whether this guy in red hoodie is a stalker. He's everywhere she is! Then she noticed the purple notebook. It was her planner! She must have dropped it when they bumped into each other.

"Oh hey, thanks. Menggelabah sekejap saya tadi, ingat tinggal dekat rumah," there's a hint of relief in her voice.

"It's nothing. Awak ni clumsy lah, lain kali tengok kiri kanan dulu sebelum melintas okay," then he realises how lame that sound. Really? Tengok kiri kanan dulu sebelum melintas? Pfft.

"Oh by the way, saya F. Awaklah orang yang potong line tadi kan? Ganas juga eh awak ni!" the girl seem clueless, perhaps F is being too-friendly. They are strangers after all, he had never seen her before today.

She hesitates for a second. She's thinking whether to really introduces herself.

"Oh, hi F. I'm S," that's all she could muttered, a million scenes has played inside her mind on what to say, but that was all that could come out from her mouth. She's starting to fidget with the planner on her hand and stops when she noticed that he notices it.

He's trying to figure out what to say. She seems lika a cold person. Or perhaps the workload is taking it's toll on her, she seem to be deprive of sleep, her face couldn't lie.

"Oh okay then, nice to meet you, S," he could see no reaction, and as he start to walk away, S practically shouted "Eh, thanks tau planner I ni! You know what, I'll treat you to lunch tomorrow, amacam?"

"Eh tak payahlah susah-susah, saya just bagi planner je," F said, trying to hide that he's actually just pretending to insist on her offer.

"Eh no, I insist. Come on, awak free tak 2 petang esok? Gimme your digit then I'll text you," she exudes such confidence that she doesn't seem to possess just 5 minutes ago.

"Uh okay then, yes 2 petang saya free," F said.

They exchange their digit and part ways. F tries to steal one last glance just before he head home. The girl in brown faux leather jacket, she really is one of a kind.

Mentally exhausted

Yes, I am. I don't even know why.


I want to dissapear from the world for a while.

Monday, April 11, 2011

HIMSB Part Deux


No signs of her. Where could she have gone to? It has been almost an hour of searching but to no avail. Her brown faux leather jacket really stands out but there's not even a glimpse of that. Back at the coffee shop, she seemed to have something dangling around her neck. A student ID, perhaps. Maybe she's enrolling at the same university. He'd try his luck. But first, Measurement 1023 is waiting at the university.

Off he went to his car, start the engine, turn on the radio to full blast of Blood Red Shoes - It's Getting Boring By The Sea.


He's trying to focus in the class but he can't take his mind off that girl. There's really something about her, even if she smirks and abruptly cut the line. She's probably very rebellious.

Number, numbers. It's all numbers. Calculate this, calculate that. Just for the cost of staircase, you have to calculate the concrete, the mixer, the worker. It's enough to make one crazy with all this numbers flying around.
"Hold on, just half an hour left" he tries to assure himself.


With new assignments on hand, he stepped out of the class with an exhausted face. There's a small courtyard just outside the class, trees are planted around it, and it give the place a shade. There's benches around, and he walked towards his favourite spot. There's one problem, there's someone else sitting there.

And it's the girl in brown faux leather jacket.

Saturday, April 9, 2011



"Hello again friend of a friend
I knew you well"

Half-conscious, he reach for the phone and turn the alarm off. He open his eyes and look at the schedule for today, now today is going to be a long day his head whispered inside. Lectures and assignments to submit with the ever-closer deadline. Last minute work is his speciality. Other people would call it laziness but his world have conflicting view.

Sat up with his eyes closed, forcing his feet to move towards the bathroom and have a nice warm shower. All fresh, he put on his best formal attire. White shirt, black slack, brown belt and maroon tie. It has always been his favorite formal wear. He got a feeling today is going to end well. He's not entirely wrong on that. He made a coffee to kick off the day and prepare to face the daunting outside world.


The sky is filled with clouds hence giving the day a shade. The sun is peeking behind the clouds, unable to lit the day with ferocious Farenheit. The wind blows mild, what a perfect day.

As he made his way to class, he knows what the lecturer will be rambling about. The assignment that would be due in the next two days. It carry 30% of final exam marks, so it's a big deal. He doesn't sweat it though, there only some minor tweaks to do and he's prepare to submit it.


Lunch break. He's craving for some chocolate from a coffee shop so off he went to the nearest mall. It was a bitch getting to that mall. Traffic jams, bad drivers, crossing pedestrians that seems want to commit suicide and don't even mention about the parking. Took him nearly 30 minutes just to find one, and even that is far away from the entrance of the mall.

He steps inside the mall and felt the air-conditioner on his head, that feels good. He take the elevator the next level and there it is, the coffee shop. But when he saw the lines.. it was long. But he doesn't mind, he wanted that chocolate so bad. As he queue up and nearing the counter, along came a woman who just cut in front of him.

"Hey, apa niii?" said the guy who is clearly pissed after queuing up for quite a long time.

The woman look at his face and just smirks. Oh, such arrogance. But he doesn't want to create a scene and just play it cool. After he had done buying the chocs he craved, he went looking for that woman. There's something about her.


Wednesday, April 6, 2011


I felt like writing something even if it's just nonsense so I'll just keep on writing even though I haven't got a clue to what I'm going to write and so this a spontaneous entry.

I'm not satisfied with my ride. A Satria 1.3M, standard only. The only foreign object is the steering, speaker and an air freshener. If only I have the money to upgrade Sang Kilat. And the shuddering, I don't like that. In the morning, I have to wait nearly 10 minutes for the engine to warm up, otherwise it is impossible to drive.
But you know what? I love my Sang Kilat. It's electric blue, one of my fave colour. It's manual and I love driving manual. Baru rasa remaja, pfft.

And as I grow older, I do feel that I'm becoming wiser(haha). Just, the words I'm uttering nowadays, it does reflect that I am in my early 20's and konon full of experiences.

Okay dah bye.